Love Makes a Family

Spread the love

As your family left for work or school this morning Did You Say I Love You?  How many times a day Do You Say I Love You to your family? Love makes a family and it is so important that we do that everyday.

Let me tell you about my mom. Her mom died when she was only 10 years old of a ruptured appendix. Her dad remarried but this lady did not want her or her brother. They had a little 3 year old sister that was allowed to stay, but her and her brother had to find another place to live.

My mother went to live with her grandma who ran a boarding house. Her brother found different places to live as he grew up. This happens but how do these families learn the meaning of love in families.

As I grew up my sister and brothers and I did not know about this until later in life. I could not imagine this grandma I grew up with could do that. She was always a kind and loving woman.

Love makes a family but growing up I am sure my mother did not hear  I love you as much as if her mother would have lived. This is why I was 47 years old when my mother told me she loved me.  I vowed my own children would hear I love you every day no matter how old they were. It is so important we do that as parents.

As we took care of foster kids for 15 years we saw this all the time. These kids that have been born into families that are on drugs and are alcoholics  never feel love they just try to survive. It is necessary they hear and feel  that bonding from birth. Another reason why they are so mad when they have to leave their homes and live with people they do not know.

In many families, these words come easily. But if you grew up never having them saying “I love you” this may feel somewhat unnatural to you. People have trouble saying “I love you” for many reasons–they’re unhappy or they’ve been hurt before and are afraid the feeling will not be reciprocated again.

Why is it important to say “I love you”?  We could mention what happens to children that never hear those words, relate what kind adults they may become, or how those words can bring an invisible healing power to people in hospitals; how they bring courage and strength to those facing seemingly insurmountable odds, how a single “I love you” can propel a man from trying hard to doing the impossible.

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These words are timeless, boundless, inspiring and so important. My dad grew up in a house of 10 kids and a very strict father. There was a sign by the toilet that said you can only use 4 squares of toilet paper at a time. (can you imagine?) We as kids loved to go there!  But when you think about it raising 10 kids in this little house had to be very hard.  How many times did they say “I Love You?” 

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I am sure they did some but when I learned more about my dad growing up it had to be hard just doing the everyday things to survive. In my grandma’s journal she said she always went to bed saying “I have done all I can do and tomorrow is another day.” Times were hard back then and it was later in life that my father told me he loved me.  Once again that comes from how you grow up. 

I know people (like my parents) are uncomfortable saying “I love you.” Are you one of them? However uncomfortable, force yourself to say it, over and over, until the habit becomes second nature.

Some Ways Family Members Can Say I Love You….

Speak kindly to your child. 

Let your “no” mean no.

Let your “yes” mean yes.

Ask “Do you want to talk?”

Listen, Listen, Listen.

Make Free Time.

Laugh out loud.

Love is a hug,  a kiss, a whisper to cheer the heart of the other. Did you know you need 12 hugs a day to keep the doctor away?

Say “I am Proud of You”

Request that your child tag-along on errands

Send text messages throughout the day that each start with, “I love you because …”

Smile Be home when they are home.

Get Ice Cream Together.

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Make “I love you” the last thing you say every night.

Keep your promises.

Help spread the love in families and perhaps if more people said those words it would strengthen families.

Too many times, we just take it for granted that those we love know we love them so we feel as if we do not need to say it.

You do not have to have a ring on your finger to say I love you. “You need to be the kind of person who not only feels love, but gives love.” The more you say it, the more you feel it. Now go share your love today.

Thanks For Visiting, Talk Soon.




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